while my guitar gently weeps.....

here's your gay man story for the day:

so i'm not a homophobe. i'm in the arts for pete's sake (...by the
way...who the hell is pete and why do we always sake him???). i'm
confident of my masculinity and actually do have homosexual friends through
the theater community. ANYHOO, besides this, i do think they're funny
mother f*ckers when they're confident of their sexuality and have a sense
of humor about it. SO...i was in the copy room the other day and this guy
who i wasn't sure of (sexual orientation wise) was walking toward our huge
laser printing machine (...let's call him "Metro Man"). i was at the xerox
machine and there was another dude standing next to the laser printer
(let's call him "Mr. Schmoe"). now i'm always interested in verifying the
validity of my "gay-dar," so that's why i actually questioned which team
this guy was batting for. Sometimes you just never know how you should
joke with people and you don't want to come off as offensive if you're
saying shiet that doesn't come across the right way. i'm sure many of you
understand.

Metro Man sees that the laser printer isn't working right and Mr. Schmoe is
trying to see what's wrong with it. Mr. Schmoe called the help desk to
send someone to that copy room in order to fix it, so he says to Metro Man,
"The guy didn't come down this morning." SO, Metro Man, who seemed to be
impatient, retorts back, "Yeah, yeah....the story of my life." TA-DA!! AY
- YO!! and thus we have verified it with a funny ass story to boot.....

didn't get it? read it slower and make the dialogue into sexual innuendos,
for pete's sake!!